Truth and fear

Today's offering is in two parts as the title suggests.

Firstly truth. Truth is a painful commodity and perhaps when it is at its most painful it is also at its most truthful. I have been made aware today (in words of one syllable!) that my continued forays into such deep anxiety is driving my family away from me. However much I am reassured (by those whom I love the most) that much of my anxiety is unfounded, bouncing it all back to them using the now familiar 'yes, but what if...' formula is, in the long term, inherently damaging to our most precious possession - our relationships.

At some point I hope to find the moral courage to blog openly about my symptoms (I believe that for me severe anxiety is but a symptom of my underlying poor mental health) and draw some comments from those who are taking the time to keep reading as this develops. I do know that a couple of people are reading this and I am hugely grateful that they are sharing the journey.

Secondly fear. I have been privileged to encounter a new friendship and it is one which already means a great deal to me. This 'ordinary bloke' (that is the phrase he uses to describe himself) read my last blog and offered a thought via e-mail on my observations of those who find it difficult to maintain friendships with those who have mental health issues. His observation is simple and I believe accurate. People are afraid of those who are psychologically unwell - hence, I suppose, terms like 'nutter' and 'loony' which have long been part of our vernacular, and yes, I have been called both of those and a few more besides! If anyone reading this knows someone with a mental health issue may I offer two thoughts? First, please don't avoid them out of your fear; trust me, when you are unwell you need all the friends you can get! Second, the mentally unwell spend a lot of each day just being afraid of themselves; walk awhile alongside them, share your fears together, dispel some myths and discover how much you have in common.

Thanks again for sharing this personal journey of mine.