The diabolical shouts louder

It is indeed remarkable to observe that for the first time in, I don't know so let's just say 'ages', I have posted on three consecutive days.  I am sat here making myself;  I have had a very difficult day in which the negative 'demon' on my shoulder has over powered the positive one time and time again.

The Greek word for demon, δαίμων, was originally rather neutral and certainly did not embody the instinctively negative connotations it has today.  Demons were supernatural, spiritual beings who could indeed be malevolent even evil but they could also be benevolent, despite the christian biblical tradition which essentially considers the devil, διάβολος (the root of our modern word for 'diabolical'), to be, if you like, the chief demon.

So, you may well ask, where is all of this leading?  Anxiety for me is like having a demon on each shoulder - one good, balanced, reasoned and rational and one, shall we say 'diabolical'.  I spoke to a close friend today whose daughter is taking a little time to find work.  She is bright (holding a good degree), articulate and well balanced.  She will find the right post before too long for, as one of the people I trust most in this world reminded me today, there is still work but at the moment it might just take a little longer to find it.

Whilst it may seem terrible, this is only a transitory phase in the economic life of the country and, therefore, as we come through into the other side of this financial reorganisation matters will steadily improve. Furthermore, and now forgive me as I am going to become explicitly anecdotal, my eldest son will graduate in the summer of 2013 and will then, possibly train for a further year to go into teaching the subject that he loves, music.  It is January 2011 and the bad demon on my shoulder has encouraged me to believe (because of the news about my friend's daughter) that in 2014 when my eldest son looks for his first permanent position (and not until 2017 for my youngest son) there is ample evidence to suggest, nay prove, that there will be nothing for him.

The 'good demon' is quietly, gently, urging me to heed the more reasoned and rational approach I have already described but the διάβολος shouts louder.  The 'good demon' is characteristically what the psalmist calls the 'still small voice of calm'.  I am hoping that the quieter voice will persist and persuade me to stop stressing and accept that the conclusions I have drawn are each, truly, a non sequitir.  And let me not forget that as dark as my mind feels today the evidence of the past has shown me, time and again, that all I feared and worried and worried and worried about proved groundless.

There are no guarantees for the future for any of us, not even one.  But the rational side of me, the advice of those whom I love and my past experience, all of which make up the 'good demon', do suggest today's anxiety is unfounded and irrational.  I just wish the 'good demon' would speak up a bit and the διάβολος would just 'poke off'!  Then maybe when my anxieties raise their ugly head again I might come to believe they are unfounded and learn to shout them down for myself.